Unlike face-to-face interactions where guys (and ladies) kinda have to answer when you ask them whether they want to hang or not, because you're, you know, staring at them, having screens between you might make them think they have a hall pass to be a little less delicate (or speedy) in response. (If youve ever felt the icy sting of a text that reads nothing more than k, you know what Im talking about).

Buuut...on the flipside, sending that text **might** just kindle the start of something amazing (perhaps even a full-blown relationship)if the person youre messaging is into you, too. That's something that might not have ever happened if youd never hit send.

In fact, these texts and their responses, despite their cringeworthy potential, are major indicators pointing to whether this person even deserves your attention in the first place. Telling someone how you feel, asking them out , or apologizing for saying something you regret is ALWAYS a good idea.

The tricky part is knowing how and when to tell them. After all, some things are better said in personor better received after youve both have had to recalibrate (say, after a blowout argument).

But don't worry. For all those times you're wondering, Should I text him?, experts are here to guide you.

1. Well, are you sober?

If youve been a little, um, over-served, it might seem like a good plan to hit up that guy youve been meaning to ask out or booty call your latest date (actually, a lot of things might seem like a good idea, but that's for another time).

And while you might not always wish you could take them back in the morning (Im talking both the drinks and the text), theres a chance you might say or do something you regret, says Ann Rosen Spector, PhD, a clinical psychologist in Philadelphia.

Once you send the message, she stresses, thats itits out there. So if youre sending something risky (or risqu) , you might want to wait until youre more clearheaded (read: sober).

And yeah, though you may have purposefully turned to alcohol in order to lower your inhibitions and finally ask him out, youll probably feel a lot better about hitting send when you can take ownership of the message...and the unpredictable reaction you get from them.

2. Have you recently gone out on a date with him?

Yeah? Then definitely text him. The best way in, says Spector, is to bring up something you talked about during your date. Say he mentioned a movie hes super into and you catch a trailer for the directors next moviesend him something like: Hey, I just saw the trailer for [directors name here]s new film. I can see why youre into her stuff. If youre free, want to watch it with me next Thursday?

Or if nothing really stood out (are you sure you want to go on a second date?), thank him for a nice time and suggest something the two of you can do in the future.

"Should I text him?" isn't the only question you'll ask when it comes to dating. All the answers to your burning Qs, here:

3. Do you want to ask him out?

All together now: Text him! Text him! Text him!

How you ask him out is totally up to you, says Beverly Palmer, PhD, clinical psychologist, professor emeritus at California State University, Dominguez Hills, and author of Love Demystified . For some it might feel more comfortable to ask someone out face-to-faceagain, because of the body language you can throw in there to spice up the moment.

But if making a move digitally is more your speed, tell him youve been interested in spending one-on-one time with him and you were wondering when he had some free time to grab a drink. When he says yes (because who wouldnt want to go out with you?) propose a time and place and lock it in.

If he's a loser and says no...well, you didn't realize lose anything, anyway. Let it sting for a sec...then on to the next.

4. Have you already texted him today?

If so, Put. Down. Your. Phone. Now.

Unless the two of you text back and forth a lot and regularly spam each other with funny tweets you come across during the day, theres no reason to send text after text.

Spectors okay with a double text on occasion, but if youve already sent numerous texts that have gone unanswered, hes probably busy and hasnt seen them, hes seen them and hasnt had a chance to answer yet, or he has no intention of answering you at all. Either way, this is the perfect opportunity to take a hint, says Spector, and back off a little.

Shes not saying you can NEVER send multiple messages to this person, but a long string of texts can feel overwhelming, especially if youre just getting to know each other. Instead, she says, stick to one message at a time and ease them into your texting habits the way youd ease into any other part of the relationship.

Keep in mind that a little mystery on your end, too, is a good thing. People find it attractive to know you have other things going on in your life that have nothing to do with them. Texting all day long makes those (sexy!) mysterious vibes really tough, if not impossible, to put out there.

If you have a strong urge to text someone a hilarious meme you just scrolled past, text it to your mom.

5. Did he text you first?

Then responding is totally up to you.

If you recently went on a date with him have to wonder Should I text him?, youre probably on the fence about how you feel. So take some time and think about your response. After a beat, if youre willing to give it another go, respondbut if youre thinking youll eventually end up ghosting him, gently tell him youre not interested.

Now, if getting a text from him gave you butterflies la seventh grade, text him right back, baby.

Pro tip: He texted you, so you already know hes interested. From this point on, dont overthink things . You don't NEED to wait 10 minutes, or 20, or 22 (so it doesn't seem like you're counting). Bring up things that are happening in your liferecent music youve just discovered, a cool speakeasy bar you've been wanting to check outand let the conversation flow.

6. Has he been ghosting you?

Girl, I say to ghost him right back , but thats just me being petty.

Spector, the pro in this situation, says to feel it out for yourself. If his text is an explanation explaining why hes been MIA and you feel like hearing him out, you do you and write him back. But if youre fed up and dont really care about where hes been, feel free to tell him youre not feeling him anymore or straight-up delete his text without replying and move on.

If he doesnt offer an explanation for his radio silence and hits you with a Hey, its been a while. What have you been up to? and his absence really got under your skin, feel free to ask him where TF hes been (though maybe slightly less aggressively). From there, decide if continuing the conversation is worth your time. Yours is precious, and there's no reason to waste it on a crappy texter (or worse, crappy dude).

7. Is it a weekend or a weekday?

Your weekday texts might be just as casual as your weekend texts, but lets face it, weekend texts have a tendency to be a little more flirtatious. After all, you dont have obligations like work getting in the way of meeting up with the peeps in your life.

As such, sending a weekend text has way more potential to lead to a date or having the person joining you and your friends at brunch. If thats what you want, sending Friday-through-Sunday texts is probably the move for you. Just don't forget Rule #1: Don't drunk text things you'll regret when you're sober.

On the flipside, while weekend texts can lead to much-wanted in-person time, they might not always be well-received, says Palmer. Some people might want to you to send them casual texts during the week, so they know youre actually feeling them and not just interested in a weekend hookup. (Yes, men can be just like you.)

8. Is there a major event going on his life?

Reaching out to him to wish him luck on a big presentation he mentioned he had a work is a nice thing to do, and hell probably appreciate it. Even if youve only gone on a few dates, says Palmer, dont hesitate to send him a quick note. It lets him know youre thinking of him and keeps you fresh in his mind.

Maybe let him initiate the next convo to keep that mystery going (dating/texting is very much a cat-and-mouse game, annoyingly enough), but don't be surprised if his next text is about seeing you.

9. Are you texting him just because?

Who doesnt want to receive a text that says, I miss you, or This song Im listening to made me think of you? Ill admit, these texts can be kind of mushy, but even if youre not in a full-blown relationship, its just a nice text to send and a nice text to receiveitll make the guy in your life feel good.

So if you've passed Rule #3, then go for itunless theyre an ex.

10. Are they an ex?

Well, that changes things.

Being that you and this person are no longer together, texting is probably best reserved for moments when you need something specific and have a clear goal for reaching out to them, Palmer says.

Even if youre both still single and theres no risk of upsetting their new partner or yours, take a moment, appreciate the song that reminded you of them for a minute, and move on without hitting them up about it.

You broke up because you werent a good fit, so allow him the time he needs to focus on himself and develop new relationships. (And you do the same, girl.) Plus, says Palmer, if you havent maintained a friendly relationship in the past, theres a chance hell ignore your text, anyway.

However, if the purpose of your text is specific, a.k.a. you need to talk to him about the dog you shared together or you need the number for the auto mechanic who he had work on your car, go ahead and text him. Just make it a direct message and resist including too many pleasantries. (I know it's hard, but worth it.)

11. Is this a new relationship?

By the time you become official, says Palmer, youll have some sense of your S.O.s texting preferences and theyll have a pretty good idea of yours. So if youd normally send him a few texts throughout the day, keep it going.

The way couples communicate is specific to the people in the relationship...\"

The way couples communicate is specific to the people in the relationship, according to Palmer, and every relationship is slightly different. People who have possessive or insecure tendencies might want to receive both good-morning and good-night texts even on days they see each other, and others might find all the texting overbearing. The safest bet is to do what feels right for you while considering what your partner would like to receive, too.

And if youre not sure, ask, says Palmer. Yeah, the question might sound weird, but relationship get weird sometimes. Try: Hey, I sent you a few texts today and you were slow to respond. Were they distracting to you at work? Would you prefer if I kept my texts to the essentials? Or: Hey, Id love to hear from you a little more during the day, just so I know Im on your mind.

12. Have you recently fought?

This one most likely applies to folks who are already past the initial dating stage (if you've gotten into a tiff before your third date, yikes...). And it really relies on timing and delicate phrasing, Spector says.

Even if youve been in a relationship for a while, your best bet is to wait until the waters between you two have calmed. That way, youll both be more receptive to the others explanation for why you were each hurt.

Then theres the matter of apologizing or addressing the argument from a distance. In these cases, a face-to-face conversation is your best bet because you have the added bonuses of gestures and facial expressions to get your point across (not to mention, get a better read on their reaction).

That\'s the beauty of a text...You can take your time to curate the perfect response.

But if youre worried about the discussion escalating into another argument , Spector says texting is okay. Just choose your words carefully. That's the beauty of a text...You can take your time to curate the perfect response.

Her post-argument text formula? First, explain what made you upset, and then take ownership for your part in the argument, she says. Try something like this: About that fight yesterdayI had a tough time with the joke you made. I didnt think it was funny and it hurt my feelings. Im sorry, though, for raising my voice.

13. Do you need to vent?

Theres no harm in wanting to get something off your chest, says Palmer. If youre upset about something, the move is to always express how youre feelingonce you've had a chance to organize your thoughts. But dont expect a reply, she adds.

This is a great opportunity to gauge where you stand with someone, says Palmer. Their response will tell you everything you need to know about how seriously they take your feelings. If they answer, take what youve written to heart, and want to work things out, great.

But if they disregard what youre saying or straight-up ignore you, then you probably dont need to spend any more time texting them at all.

14. Do you want to know if this relationship is going any further?

Theres nothing wrong with telling someone how you feel over text and expressing that you see the connection developing into something more, like an exclusive, relationship Palmer says. If he feels the same way, hell text you back and say so.

However, once you say, Im really into you, the ball will be in his court. That means you might not get a reply if he's easily scared off.

And while that sucks, you don't want to be with a person who can't even handle a serious convo via text. Trust.