This week on Ask Pulse, we are addressing a Worried girlfriend's concern about her boyfriend's movie choices that is affecting her trust in him.
Dear Pulse,
I've been dating my boyfriend for a little over six months, and everything has been going smoothly—except for one issue.
Whenever I visit him and he puts on a movie, it's either a horror film where people are being brutally murdered or a thriller filled with people still being murdered. These movies are extremely gruesome, and I find them very distressing to watch.
Lately, this has started to affect my trust in him. I can’t help but fear his constant exposure to such violent content might influence him in a bad way.
My fear is that it’s only a matter of time before these movies affect him to the point where he might also do the same to me and other people. Are my concerns valid, or am I overthinking this whole situation? What should I do?
— Worried girlfriend
Dear worried girlfriend,
It's understandable that you're feeling uneasy about your boyfriend's movie choices, especially if the content is making you uncomfortable. However, it's important to remember that people's tastes in movies don't necessarily reflect their personalities or behaviour in real life.
Many people enjoy horror and thriller genres for the adrenaline rush, suspense, and storytelling, not because they have violent tendencies.
That said, your feelings are completely valid. If his movie choices are causing you distress, Communicate it with him. Let him know that the violent content makes you uncomfortable and explain your concerns about how it’s impacting your trust.
A caring partner will listen to your feelings and be willing to find a compromise that makes both of you comfortable.
If he dismisses your feelings or insists on continuing this behaviour despite knowing it upsets you, that might be a red flag—not because of the movies, but because of his lack of consideration for your comfort and well-being.
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It's okay to set boundaries for your own mental and emotional health. If watching these movies together is a deal-breaker for you, that's something you have every right to express. At the end of the day, trust your instincts and prioritise your peace of mind.
— Pulse