The horror and anger Dilys Sillah expresses when she talks about cases of children or women being raped or sexually abused in Ghana is palpable.

It's these instinctual reactions that she wants others to feel when they read these stories, instead of looking at ways to place blame or responsibility on the victim.

Sillah grew up between the United Kingdom and Ghana, and now runs a charity and NGO for both countries called Who Will Hear My Cry. It raises awareness on child abuse, rape, domestic violence and child sexual exploitation.

Sillah is able to compare and contrast the way children and other victims of sexual abuse and assault are treated in Ghana compared to the UK, and the access to help when they are abused.

Speaking with Pulse Ghana while in Accra, Sillah tells of her frustration at how children are treated in Ghanaian society, from sexual grooming through to child rape, and how a child can be held responsible for what happens to them.

Sillah dove headfirst into advocacy work after following the Kwasi Kyei Darkwah (KKD) rape accusations. Through the reporting in the media, on talkshows and comments she saw on social media, she saw a lot of victim-blaming and misunderstanding about what rape is.

A video on her YouTube channel where she spoke about the “fundamental misunderstanding” people in Ghana have about rape, about victim-blaming and a woman's right to say no to sex led people to start telling her their own sexual abuse stories.

“I couldn't stop. I was absolutely inundated. It was like for the first time these people felt somebody was finally listening to them and actually got it,” she recalls.

From there she set up Who Will Hear My Cry (WWHMC) in Ghana and in the UK.

She focuses on advocacy and support for victims of sexual abuse, as well as prevention through education, by challenging social myths and the eradication of the practices of damaging cultural mindsets and attitudes.

She runs workshops in the UK for 12-17 year olds, called the Diamond Within, where she teaches the girls about the power of choice, what a healthy relationship looks and feels like and the grooming process (where a sexual predator will lure a child into trusting them, be it with gifts, kindness or friendship, only to exploit that trust by abusing the child).

She also runs a workshop for teenage boys teaching them about sexual boundaries and responsibility.

In Ghana, her work is more concerned with victim-blaming attitudes – especially to children.

“We have a fundamental understanding in England that a child is a child and a child is not responsible for the actions of an adult.

“We don't get that here. We still try and make a child, whether it's through the back door or the window, responsible for the actions of an adult and those are the fundamentals here that need to change before we go on to phase two,” she says.

“Our culture is a perform and reward system. We as Africans do not love unconditionally. You do well at school you get rewarded, you don't do well at school you are in the doghouse. That is just how it works.

“Once that comes into the sexual arena where children are groomed and they have to perform and are rewarded, where they understand eventually that is the system by which they will operate to survive the dynamic becomes 'I will do and you will give'.

“That is the system. It is not that you have a holy child and all of a sudden they become a little demon who decides 'I'm going to sleep with uncle so and so, so I can get a new pair of shoes.' No, that child is sexualised and groomed from a young age and they begin to understand the bartering system sexually.”

There needs to be societal and legal changes to better protect children, and understand what rape, child abuse and sexual exploitation means.

And the legal terminology used in Ghana has to change.

“If a child is sexually abused or raped - because  that is what it is - we term it as defilement,” Sillah says.

“If you look up the dictionary definition to defile, it means to make unclean or dirty. Why should a victim of rape or abuse be classed as unclean or dirty, when the unclean or dirty person is the one that doesn't have enough respect to respect their sexual boundaries and control themselves from perpetrating that kind of crime against a child, or another human being.”

Sillah is appalled at the way victims of sexual abuse are treated in Ghana, that because of attitudes and systems, some victims feel they can't tell anyone what they are going through.

“We need to create a system that allows you to feel comfortable and safe by telling somebody because these things are shrouded in secrecy. That is how people are able to continue to abuse, violate and victimise.”

While the UK has systems and frameworks to deal with abuse allegations, Sillah says in Ghana it is “Russian roulette”.

“You might be lucky if you speak to the right person, if you don't all hell is going to break loose. That really is the fear and the uncertainty that has got to be removed from a child's whole perception of whether they will seek help or if their voice will be heard.”

But, with those instinctual feelings of shock and anger running through her veins, Sillah is determined to see change in Ghana.

“There is such a battle ahead that one can't even remotely take that for granted. You are dealing with mindsets and culture that has been there for time immemorial. You are dealing with people who don't want to change.

“You are dealing with people that are in positions of power the system benefits because they can exploit, they can abuse, they can rape, they can violate. So, here you have a woman like me who says 'no, you will not rape, you will not violate, you will not exploit because enough is enough'."

Despite the challenges, Sillah is propelled by the knowledge “people are fed up with seeing what is happening to our women and children.”

There is a comfort in knowing people like her allies George Baiden, Director of African Movement for the Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect, human rights lawyer Irene Aborchie, Dr Paul Henry Dsane-Aidoo, Ghanaian actress and activist Lydia Forson and women empowerment organisations like the Gender Studies and Human Rights Documentation Centre and Action Aid Ghana and fighting the same battle.

And to those who are taking advantage of women and children, Sillah has a message.

“Understand that you can not maintain the status quo because if for nothing else people are beginning to realise we can expect better. We can do better and we demand better. It's as simple as that. It is not going to remain the same.”