A newly wedded couple’s honeymoon was truncated abruptly after the bride allegedly hit the groom’s head with a bottle because according to her, the man’s penis was a “hairy, scary cucumber”.

The incident occurred at a breakfast in Coffee Bay, South Africa where the amateur footballer and his wife he had met in church were supposed to enjoy their honeymoon.

The 32-year-old Mnombo Madyibi reportedly narrated his ordeal in an interview with Daily Star that: “All was well and she enjoyed the foreplay.

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“But all hell broke loose the moment I took off my underwear.

“Before I knew it, she knocked me over with a bottle of wine before attempting to suffocate me with a red and white teddy bear I’d bought her as a gift.”

Still trying to figure out what could have compelled his wife to perpetrate such an extreme violence on him, Mnombo Madyibi was quoted as saying: “I think she’s angry because I could only afford a cheaper honeymoon instead of the one she wished for in Zanzibar.”

The said woman whose identity has not been disclosed also attempted explanation for her act saying: “He has a big penis – long like a cucumber and hairy and scary like a bush.”

She however denied attacking him with bottle as the victim had alleged, saying: “I only slapped him on the cheek.”

It was after catching a glimpse of Madyibi’s manhood that it dawned on the woman why his colleague footballers who have seen penis before refer to him as anaconda.

Even as Madyibi is in bandage, he is still contemplating how to salvage the situation so he can have his wife back.

He was quoted as saying: “I’ve only heard of penis enlargement and not penis shrinking.”